


Liar

by a_skyfull_of_starz



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Hurt, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, Minor Spoilers, Unrequited Love, post-Shiganshima
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-23
Updated: 2020-03-23
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:22:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,471
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23283958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/a_skyfull_of_starz/pseuds/a_skyfull_of_starz
Summary: After Reiner, Zeke and the Cart Titan escape from Shiganshima, Reiner asks where Bertolt is.
Relationships: Reiner Braun/Bertolt Hoover
Comments: 3
Kudos: 51





	Liar

**Author's Note:**

> I posted this on my tumblr, which means it should technically go in Tumblr Collections, but it's long enough to be a fic on its own. 
> 
> Spoilers for characters post-season 3 of the anime.

Reiner woke up inside a tent, with no idea how he got there. His entire body ached as though it had been hit by a large boulder and his head throbbed with every movement.

How did he get here? The last thing he could remember was standing on top of the wall with Bertolt, telling him that he found him unreliable (why would he say something that awful to him?) and Bertolt’s hand on his back, saying that Reiner could count on him. After that came nothing but a black hole.

And pain. He could remember, he had been in terrible agony. He rolled his neck and got up, wincing as he did. Every movement sent shooting pains across his torso and into his head.

Reiner found his shirt (covered in blood, as were his trousers, what had happened to him?) and exited the tent.

They were on top of the wall by the docks, which were empty. He supposed their Marleyan escort had yet to return from bringing Ymir to the mainland. To his right, lay the Cart Titan.

“Hello Pieck,” Reiner murmured.

She turned a large eye on him but didn’t reply. He supposed she was tired. Not surprising, to his knowledge she had kept that form for close to two months now.

“So, you’re finally up?” a voice said from behind him. It was Zeke.

“Yeah,” Reiner said. “Uh what happened to me?”

“Your head was blown off and they cut your arms off,” Zeke said matter-of-factly. “They were about to cut your throat when Pieck and I intervened.”

“They managed to capture me?” Reiner asked his heart sinking. “So the mission…”

“We failed,” Zeke said bluntly. “Despite Pieck and I laying waste to almost the entire army, the Coordinate got away with a handful of soldiers.”

So Eren was still alive. Zeke must have noticed Reiner’s expression, for he said, “I’m not going to beat about the bush, Braun, this will not go over well with our superiors.”

“No sir,” Reiner murmured.

“This would not have happened if you, Annie and Bertolt had not failed in the first place,” Zeke continued. “I will be damned if Pieck and I go down for your mistakes. I’m afraid that this time, I will not be able to shield you, Reiner.”

The mention of his friend’s name stirred up a memory inside of Reiner, and he felt his heart start to race.

“Where’s Bertolt?” he whispered. 

Zeke’s face paled slightly (on any other day, Reiner would have been bemused at the sight of their usually-unflappable war chief showing any kind of emotion other than cold detachment). “Ah,” was all he said.

“Zeke, where is he?” Reiner said, his voice growing louder. “Is he in your tent? Where is Bertolt?”

“We had to leave him behind,” Zeke said.

“No.” Reiner shook his head. “You’re lying to me, aren’t you? This is my punishment for messing up.”

“I’m not lying, Reiner,” Zeke said. “We left Bertolt behind.”

“Shut up,” Reiner shouted, and he was surprised to see Zeke actually take a step back. “Shut up,” he repeated, more quietly this time. “You’re lying. I know you are. Bertolt is the most powerful of the Nine. You wouldn’t just leave him behind.”

“But we did,” Zeke said and there was something in his voice that Reiner wasn’t expecting. Perhaps it was pain. It was certainly regret. Reiner turned away from him so as not to see Zeke’s face, but Zeke grabbed his shoulder and spun him around.

“Somehow Eren managed to beat the Colossal Titan, I don’t know how,” Zeke said and there it was again, that edge. “But he had cut off Bertolt’s arms and legs.” Reiner felt bile rise in his throat and he struggled to swallow it down. Zeke’s grip on his shoulder was like a vice. Reiner tried to focus on that pain rather than Zeke’s words. “When Pieck and I crossed the walls to retrieve you two, Eren threatened to kill Bertolt if I came closer. I had no choice. I had to leave him.”

“You could have fought him,” Reiner said quietly.

“I couldn’t-,”

“You could have fought him,” Reiner shouted and suddenly he was free of Zeke’s grip. He was on top of the older man, his fists aching as he broke them over and over on Zeke’s face, his tears and saliva raining down on him in time with his blows. “You could have fought him you could have fought him instead you left him to die you could have fought him,” Reiner screamed.

His feet left the ground as Pieck picked him up. “That’s enough,” she said. Reiner raised his hand to his mouth and she shook him lightly. “You do not want to shift right now, Reiner, you know that between the two of us, Zeke and I will beat you.”

“I don’t care,” Reiner shouted.

“Just shut up and listen,” Pieck said. “What Zeke is saying is true. He was injured after he fought the male Ackermann. He couldn’t shift to protect Bertolt and you know I’m useless in a fight on my own. Bertolt was my friend too,” she said, and even in her titan form, Reiner could here the pain in her voice.

“We have to go back for him,” Reiner said.

“Impossible,” Zeke said.

“Pieck, put me down, or I swear I will shift in your hand and blow your arm away,” Reiner said.

Pieck considered him for a moment before setting him gently down again.

“Please, War Chief Jaeger,” Reiner said. He stood at the best attention he could manage with his aching body. “Please can we go back for him.”

“It’s been two days,” Zeke said. “They’ll have him safely locked away by now.”

If he isn’t already dead. None of them said it, but Reiner was sure that they all thought it. A glimmer of light shone across the ocean. “That’ll be our commanders returning,” Zeke said, turning away from Reiner. “Pack your things. We’ll meet them down on the docks.”

Reiner turned and strode blindly back to his tent. He had no intention of packing his things. Instead, he picked up his stolen ODM gear and strapping it on. He checked the gas canister. Almost empty. Oh well, on foot it would be. He could refill in Shiganshima.

He turned to see Zeke in the entrance of the tent. “What are you planning, Reiner?” he asked casually.

“You may be content on just leaving him to die,” Reiner said. “But I’m not. I’m going back for him.”

“You’ll be killed before you could even get close,” Zeke said.

“I don’t care,” Reiner spat. “I don’t care if I get killed or if Marley loses the Armour or if the entire continent sinks into the ocean. Yeah Zeke,” he said, his voice lower. “I don’t care about Marley and I care even less if you report me to Commander Magarth.”

Zeke considered him for a moment, and Reiner found himself hoping that Zeke would hit him. “I know you two were friends,” Zeke said at last, and Reiner hated how he used the past tense. “Since you were little, before you inherited your titans. I know your time on the island must have been very difficult and that would only have further cemented your friendship. But you have to know that you going off on your own like this will affect a lot more people than just Pieck and I. You know that Marley holds our leashes and opposing them means consequences for a lot of people.”

And there it was. Once again, his will was not his own. Reiner rocked back on his heels, staring down at the bloodstains on his trousers.

“I love him,” he whispered. 

“I beg your pardon?” Zeke asked.

“I love him,” Reiner said, louder. Tears pricked the corners of his eyes. “Yeah that’s right, I love him. I never told him this because I was scared of what it would do to our mission, but I have always loved him.” He gasped, raising a hand up to his mouth. He couldn’t breathe. Zeke’s face remained impassive. Reiner couldn’t breathe and itfelt like there was a hole in his chest. “They’re going to kill him,” he whispered at last, his breath hurting more than any of the injuries he had sustained.

“You don’t know that,” Zeke said. “It seems Annie is still alive.”

“Annie didn’t break two of their walls,” Reiner said dully. He dropped his hand, because what was the point. What was the point of anything? “You said they were going to cut my throat when you retrieved me.” Zeke didn’t say anything, but surprised him by putting his hand on Reiner’s shoulder. “I wish you’d fought him,” Reiner whispered.

“I know,” Zeke said. “I wish I had too.”

**Author's Note:**

> I'm really not sure if I like this, but I wrote it because I was feeling sad and I kind of do want to share it with the world.


End file.
